The Village School for Human Development
Under the direction of Dr. John L. Hoff and Colette Hoff, M. Ed,
School For Human Development presents:
A Weekend for Learning about Relationship
March 6 to 8, 2015
Could Your Friendships
Use a Tune-Up?
Do you wish your friends understood you better, or that you could communicate with them more effectively?
Do you find yourselves repeating arguments that pull you farther apart and that you don't know how to resolve?
Do you wish you knew how to resolve conflicts with your boss/ coworker/ friend/ partner/ sibling/ child?
Could you use some support and guidance for a major conversation with a friend or a partner?
Would you like to know how to ask for what you want in any of your friendships?
If you answered "yes" to any of these questions, or have other questions or issues about how to have happier relationships, we can help you!
You are invited--as individuals, couples, co-workers, friends, adult family members-- to learn about relationship.
A Unique Opportunity
We don’t “automatically” know how to be in a marriage, in a family, or a close friendship. Most of our families of origin and the demonstrations of parenting we experienced offered inadequate training. We need to allow ourselves to start learning again as adults to be effective partners and friends. We are convinced that just trying harder doesn’t help as much as consciously developing skills.
During this weekend workshop, you will have many opportunities to learn and practice skills that will make all your relationships more fulfilling. In a supportive environment, you will work individually, in pairs, or triads, and small groups, and:
- Learn how to talk things through more thoroughly.
- Help others work with their stuck places, and allow them to help you with yours.
- Practice together and watch the same skills demonstrated by different personalities and in a variety of situations.
- Learn to communicate more effectively, listen and identify and ask for what you really want.
- Learn from observing others’ processes.
- Be paired with a small group (partners will be placed together) where you can practice and be observed and receive feedback. Also have time alone to reflect.
- Have your particular relational issues addressed, with gentleness and insight.
Location: Sahale Learning Center
This workshop will be held at Sahale Learning Center, a beautiful setting at the tip of the Kitsap peninsula on the Tahuya River about a mile from Hood Canal. You will be able to hike and get some exercise. We will be sharing bountiful meals and will have opportunities to socialize as a group. If you have childcare issues, let Colette know.
The cost of the weekend is $175 per person ($155 for two adults or more registering together) and includes learning materials, room and board.
Your Facilitators: John & Colette Hoff
John and Colette Hoff are gifted counselors with more than 30 years experience of empowering clients to be effective as individuals, partners, parents, and members of society.
John and Colette and the Goodenough Community, which they founded, are widely known for providing a unique experiential learning environment that focuses on helping everyone learn about relating better. John and Colette teach from well-documented findings:
- Friendship, developed over time, is one of the highest valued qualities of long-lived relationships.
- Friendship is defined partly by the ease with which partners live with each other, and partly by the thoughtfulness with which partners tend to each other’s needs.
John and Colette have much to offer you in developing more satisfying relationships.
"The theories presented in graduate school didn't fit my experience;
they were only a part of the process of healing. VSHD helped me sort it
all out and integrate who I am with what I learned in graduate school."
-MA. in Psychology
The Village School Curriculum
Through is 25 years of service, the Village School has developed
a threefold curriculum design that participants find helpful.
Students begin with a study of self, their own characteristics,
and developmental issues.
Next, relationship is explored, learning the skills required to
relate with others most effectively.
Finally, the student is prepared to study "social dynamics" while
working collaboratively in small groups and organized settings—becoming effective members of community.
Each school year follows this model. Fall term focuses on your human
development; winter term focuses on helping you use relationship to
support your growth; spring term focuses on helping you participate
effectively in organizations.
Although students can benefit from a single term, they are encouraged to
commit to a full year.
If you have additional questions, call
(206)755-8404 or email
You will study your own life as
friend. The skill of self observation will be taught and
practiced. You will learn the art of identifying what is happening
inside you intellectually, physically, and emotionally as it happens.
You will examine characteristics you think of as friendly. You will be
able to compare these to how other people see you. You will work in
You will learn the core
skills used by friends:
- Resolving conflict
- Making decisions
- Joining through
- Avoiding judgment
another’s self esteem
John Lawrence Hoff
will provide a conceptual overview and facilitate a core educational
process. He has developed his diverse interests and skills through study
of many cultures, disciplines, and spiritual traditions. Dr. Hoff's
professional interest in adult education is reflected in his resumé:
Regional Training Director for the National Training Laboratories (NTL
Institute); faculty positions in two universities and two seminaries,
and more than 200 major workshops for a variety of governmental,
private, and church agencies. His ability to inspire interest in
relationships and his practical and common-sense spirituality have had
a fundamental influence on the Goodenough Community System. He has
taught in the Village School for Human Development for all of its 25
Colette Hoff, M.Ed.,
is Director of the Village School and provides administrative
leadership. Valuing the transformation in her own life, she monitors
individual and group processes and offers leadership training to
interested students. She has served in both the public and private
sectors as a researcher and counselor. For the past 30 years, she has
been a pastoral educator for families, couples, and individuals.
School, formerly known as the Private School for Human Development,
began in 1986 and ran a certificate program through 1999, which prepared
scores of people for a more relational and effective life. The school
focus is on facilitating human development, which includes training and
leadership. In the last decade the Village School has sponsored learning
projects on topics such as finance and sexuality and now this project on
sustaining friendship in community life.
friend shares freely, advises justly, assists readily, adventures
boldly, listens patiently, and continues being a friend unchangeably”
said William Penn. The word friend is an old one and found before the
current era in Greek and in languages of the Far East. Friend was at
first a verb and referred to the action of loving kindness or
helpfulness. In other words befriending was the verb that slowly became
a noun “friend or friendship.” In most languages, to befriend is to love
and to care for. Join us as we continue to explore friendship through
Living Harmoniously as Friends, building friendly relationships and a